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Engagement 8-13-20

YOU GUYS!! I can’t believe I get to say this, I’m getting married.

For as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a wife and a mother. It might be the fact I’m the oldest child and enjoy being a big sister, I’m not sure. I grew up never really knowing what my purpose was, but never questioned wanting to be a wife and mother.

I‘m sure most of you can relate to having a desire to do or be something, and not being being able to achieve it sucks. After multiple failed relationships and false hope with the wrong guys, I felt lost. Seeing girl, after girl… after girl getting married and having babies was heartbreaking. I slowly started to lose hope, and the thought of having my own marriage and kids started to feel far out of reach. The last thing I wanted to do was rush my future because of others; while I wanted a marriage and kids, I didn’t want to make a mistake and marry the wrong guy.

I am writing this to all of you girls that feel alone, struggling and unsure as to what chapter is next for you. It might not be to get married, or even have kids. It might be a bad relationship, a new job or even walking away from a job you are not valued at. I can assure you my next chapter, is one I didn’t see coming!

Please tell me I’m not the only one that hates the phrase, “It happens when you stop searching and looking for it.” However, when it comes to my relationship this couldn’t be more true. Don’t worry, I’m getting to the good stuff…

Zach is one of my best friends (I truly mean this). He is the person I look to for guidance and and go to with my struggles. He is the person I share everything with and value how we communicate. During our friendship he opened up about having feelings for me. Me being the stubborn person I am, told him we could only be friends. It might sound harsh, but at that point in my life, I couldn’t lose him. I needed the friendship, and not having him would be even worse. If I were to open up the gate to being more than friends…It could present the opportunity for failure and the potential of losing my best friend. He agreed to remain friends, until his feelings became stronger, to the point where he wouldn’t just be my friend anymore.

I guess I’m telling you guys this because Zach wasn’t the original image I had in mind for a life partner. We all have these ideas of what is perfect should look like. How a guy is supposeto look(or girl), what can they do for us, or how much money do they make. We look for all the wrong things, and wait for this “perfect” outcome we’ve envisioned in our minds.

The moment I decide to take a chance on a man that loved me, for not just the GOOD, but the BAD qualities  as well, was the best day of my life. Zach isn’t what I pictured for my future husband, he is better. I prayed for a man who would love me unconditionally, love my family the way I do, and encourage me to always better myself; and I found that within Zach. He is the most thoughtful, hardworking, kind, and most importantly, compassionate man I’ve ever met. How lucky am I for all of those “failures”?

HOW HE DID IT…

We were asked to do a photo shoot for a local photographer. (Or so I thought.) Zach actually planned the photo shoot and location with the photographer. During the beginning of the shoot, the photographer asked me to do a few photos with me facing the sunset into the water. I turned back around, and he was down on one knee….  and, well the rest is history!

 

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